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A manifesto is bigger than fitness. It is bigger than your career. Instead, it is a written declaration of your values and intentions in life and I’d like to share mine with you and finally help you to create your own.
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But first a little backstory…

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A couple months ago I came across a post on the internet about creating a personal manifesto and the concept totally resonated with me.  All too often we get busy with life and it is easy to lose sight of what really matters to us.  Instead we find ourselves driven by different things on different days and we don’t have a predetermined course through life. We get lazy, complacent, and generally end up wasting our lives away with things that truly don’t matter to us. We become subject to the control of our ever-changing thoughts and feelings.  Having a clearly defined set of values gives us the ability to reflect on them and assess if we’re on track in our lives.  As a result, I set aside a couple of hours over a few days and pulled together my own personal manifesto.

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Note:  Below is MY personal manifesto and it represents MY beliefs and values. While the specifics of these are very relevant to me personally, they may not be YOUR beliefs and values. I have shared them here to give you an example of what a manifesto looks like. I don’t intend to entertain any discussion about whether or not you agree with my beliefs and values. My hope, instead, is that taking a look at mine will inspire you to create your own.
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My Personal Manifesto

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I am a man of God.
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I will spend time with him daily by reading his word, and through worship, and prayer. I will allow HIS love to flow through me to all those around me. I will act in faith and believe in his promises. I will behave at all times in a way that is pure and holy. I will make God a priority in our home. I will seek to serve others with a joyful and willing heart.
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I am a family man.
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I will put the needs of my family above my own.  I will lead my family in faith and finance and be strong in times of trial. I will actively love my wife unconditionally, respect her feelings, and work in partnership with her to build a lasting relationship of trust, intimacy, and happiness.
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I will be a patient and kind father and love my daughter unconditionally. I will make time to play when I’m tired and teach her through example and instruction about faith, love, relationships, health, and effort.  I value my family and I put my phone aside when I am with them.
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I value my health.

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I will nourish my body only with nutrients and limit consumption of foods and beverages that jeopardize my health. I will not be a slave to any substance. I will exercise at a challenging intensity no less than two times per week and seek opportunities to be active. I will limit sedentary behavior.

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I always do my best.

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I will seek excellence in all that I do. My time will be spent on things that I value and I will limit time spent on things that serve as distractions.

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I care about my planet.

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I will consider impact to the earth in my decisions about food and products on which I spend my money. I will seek used before new. I will reduce waste, reuse items when possible, and recycle what can be recycled. I will limit accumulation of unnecessary things.

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My life will be an example for others to follow.

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Creating YOUR Personal Manifesto

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Step 1 – Create a List

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The first step in creating a manifesto is to list all of the things that you value in your life.  At this point you don’t need to spend a lot of time figuring out which are the most important, just get them all out on paper (or on the screen if you’re a computer junkie like me).  Take some time to do this.  Ask yourself what you’d like to accomplish before you die.  Think about what you’d like for your family, friends, and colleagues to say about you at your funeral.  Decide what kind of legacy you want to leave.  Make the list as big as you can.

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Step 2 – Pick Your Top 5

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At some point you’re going to need to cut down the list of all the things you’ve listed to the top 5 or 6 things you truly value.  I’d suggest beginning by crossing out the stuff that obviously doesn’t make your top 5 first.  That should narrow things down a bit.  From there, spend some time (even if it takes a few days) to cut away at the list until only the final few remain.

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Step 3 – Expand on Your Values

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Once you’ve narrowed it down to your most important points you’ll want to expand on them so they remind you each time you read them what they really mean to you.  Most importantly, make sure the points tell you what actions you should take or how you should behave to be in line with these values.  And make sure to state everything in the present.  Don’t say “I want to have integrity”.  Say “I have integrity”.

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Step 4 – Read it Every Day

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A personal manifesto is useless if you don’t read it often.  I have mine as a document on my computer desktop and I generally read it the first time I open my computer each day.  I also have a copy in my email so I can read in on my phone and a printed paper copy I can access easily.

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I’ll be the first to admit that I am not even close to being the person I’ve presented in my manifesto, but that is the person I want to become.  And each time I read it and there is some kind of discrepancy between who I am and what I’ve written it highlights for me the changes I need to make in my life.  Most importantly, it keeps me focused on what really matters to me and reminds me when I’ve gotten off track.  I know exactly what my values are so I know exactly where to spend my time.

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I’ve only just begun this process and my life is already beginning to change.  I challenge you to step out and create your own personal manifesto.

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Define and become the person you are meant to be.

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If you’re a personal trainer you’ve undoubtedly heard (or probably said) the following sentence:

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“Man…if I could only get clients that followed everything I told them to do they would all get incredible results.  Why can’t they just listen to me?!?  Why don’t they just do what I tell them?”

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After all, they are paying you good money to tell them what to do, right?  Your job is to seek out the best training and nutrition information and convey it to them and their job is simply to follow it!

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Of course, regular readers of this blog know that I don’t agree with this position and that I believe most times it isn’t knowledge that limits the success of our clients, but the application knowledge.  And while can debate the relative importance 6 meals per day versus 2 meals per day (probably nothing in my opinion), the reality is that this doesn’t make a lick of difference to our clients because they’re just struggling to put anything we say into action.

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I’ve said before that I think psychology trumps physiology for fat loss and muscle gain in most of our clients.  I have also discussed the concept of creating behavior change being one of the biggest missing elements in the skill sets of most trainers.  Well…recently my colleague Dr. John Berardi, owner of one of the world’s largest body transformation companies, put out 4 incredible (and free) videos that illustrate the importance of this area and provide insight on how it should be done.

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If you are a personal trainer, strength coach, or even someone who is seeking to create change in their own life, these videos are an absolute MUST.  If I had to hire and train a trainer to work for me right now, these would honestly be some of the first videos I would have them watch (they are THAT good).

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Of course, embedding has been disabled for these videos so I can’t add them right here in this post, but I’d highly recommend you check out each of the links below to see the videos.

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The Compliance Solution – Part 1

The Compliance Solution – Part 2

The Compliance Solution – Part 3

The Compliance Solution – Part 4

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In the interest of transparency, these videos are a lead in to the sign up for of Precision Nutrition’s Personal Training Certification, but this is only mentioned briefly in the 4th video.  You do not have to enter your email to view the videos and I make no money if you do decide to sign up.  I honestly just think these are some of the best videos I’ve seen in regards to personal training that I’ve seen in years.

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For those who are personal trainers (and are considering launching an information product in the future), this video series is a shining example of how to launch a product while not selling your soul and making audacious claims about total nonsense.  JB is a class act and the information he provides here is top notch.

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Enjoy!

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Yesterday I posted the following picture on Facebook.  I stated that the meal contained meat, potatoes, rice, cabbage, asparagus, and strawberries.  After posting I asked the question “How many calories are on this plate?”  Before you scroll down for the answer, take a look at the photo and take a stab at it yourself.

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The answers ranged from 400 calories to 1200 calories, all the way up to “GET THAT IN MA BELLEH” (with my wife also being a smartass and suggesting that it was 4500 calories – Love you baby).  After taking guesses a dietitian colleague of mine and I independently totalled up the plate using online calorie software.  And interestingly enough, we got totally different answers!

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Her total was 1500 calories whereas mine was closer to 1000.  But when we looked at the reason for the differences they were largely attributable to differences in the estimated sizes of the portions on the plate (we both agreed that the meat was probably pork).  However, the big point here is that whichever estimate you agree with the fact remains that the food on that plate represents far more calories than most people should be consuming in a single meal.  It also means that even trained professionals have a hard time agreeing on quantities when looking at a plate like this.

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With the Christmas season upon us and the number of parties, dinners, and potluck events that will inevitably be a part of it, I think that this plate would actually even be a conservative estimate of intake for a lot of people.  There are almost always pre-dinner treats like veggie trays, hummus, and chocolates kicking around.  An even then a single plate of food might be less than most people eat (you know…try a little of everything and then go back for a second helping of the stuff you really like).  Combine that with the calories from wine, beer, and desserts (you know you HAVE to try at least one slice of each kind of pie right?) and you’ll be consuming a boatload energy that will ultimately be stored as fat.

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Doing this task made me think back to previous holiday seasons where I hadn’t paid much attention at events like these.  This year I think I’ll be a little more attentive to what I’m eating.  If nothing else, when you’re making up your plate this holiday season I hope this task inspires you to be a little more cautious with your consumption to0.  After all, the best way to lose weight in January is not to have gained it in the first place.

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Have a great weekend!

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PS: Today is the last day to save $100 on the Peak Diet and Training Summit and (due to popular demand) there is now a 2 pay option for those who prefer to pay in installments.  This package is a true beast with 15 DVDs, 2 info packed manuals, 2.0 NSCA continuing education credits, and a bunch of other bonuses available only this week.  There is no risk as the product is fully refundable so go and pick it up before the deal disappears.  Order your copy HERE.

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In case you haven’t been following along, this is the third part in a multi part series put together by my friend and colleague Chi Chiu.  The aim is to help fitness professionals understand behavior change so that they can bring about the very best in their clients.

In Part 1 of this series Chi introduced the concept of stages of change and discussed how these stages show how willing we are to change to achieve a certain goal. More importantly, he highlighted the fact that recognizing the stage and dealing with it can help you to get better results with your clients.

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In Part 2 of the series, Chi discussed the first step in dealing with those in the earliest stage called “The Window Shopper”.  Today, he’ll be covering the next step in dealing with those in this stage.  Take it away Chi….

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Step 2 – The Goal

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After you have created a safe environment, you can discuss goals. This is not about goal setting, which I will discuss in a later post on the Customer stage, but about counselling skills. I have seen many times a difference in what the client wishes and what the trainer thinks is necessary. The goal however, is neither. The goal is what you negotiate and agree upon together.

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It is perfectly normal that a client comes in with a goal in mind, but leaves with a different goal. This is great, because, you were able to make it safe enough that the client accepted your advice or was able to express himself better. With some creativity, you can usually connect or even integrate their goal with your goal. The important thing however, is that when their original goal changes for whatever reason, you need to be explicit about it for several reasons.

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1. You will be judged on your results and that’s why you need to agree upon your goal.
2. The client may have accepted the new goal without giving it real thought, and has a hard time explaining it at home to their spouse.
3. The client feels that a new goal has been forced upon him and that he has not been taken seriously.

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All these scenarios are important, but I’ve seen huge problems with the second scenario.  In this case the spouse, who may not agree that your client needs a personal trainer in the first place, has been given an opportunity to disagree further. Any social support from home is gone, which makes it harder to get results. The third scenario is also dangerous because most of the time you may think that you know what’s best for the client.  However you may not notice, because some personalities strive towards harmony all the time and they sacrifice their own needs, the client is left feeling bad afterwards without you knowing it. This requires some skills like funneling.

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Some clients talk a lot, while other clients need some encouragement and even then will not spill their guts. Both types of clients can be dealt with in the same manner with a technique called funneling.

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1. Start with an open question with ‘Can you tell me about…’
2. Then redirect the conversation by addressing a specific detail with an open question, starting with ‘what’ or ‘how’ and get even more specific if necessary with questions like ‘when’ and ‘where’.
3. Close the subject by summarizing and ask whether you understood it correctly. The only allowed answer is yes, everything else means, you need to go back to step 1 or 2.

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Just to give you an example…

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You (1): How can I help you?

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Client (2): I need to lose 15 pounds and I tried everything and always fails, and …

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You(3): Ok, so have tried it multiple times and you did not give, that means you have experience. Can you tell what worked the best for you?

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Client(4): I used a diet that was super and I lost 20 pounds, but I failed it a couple of times and jumped right back to where I started and then ….

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You (5): Excuse me for interrupting, but I find the success you had with the diet interesting, when did you follow this diet?

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Client (6): Well, two years ago for a period of six months, later that year for a period of three months and this year almost 5 months.

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You(7): That’s a very specific answer, good memory. So if I understand correctly, you have been successful before multiple times in losing weight on your own, without any help?

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Client(8): Yes

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You(9): Well, that’s a hard thing to do and you have done it a great job with the tools you had. You did not give up after the first attempt and that’s the kind of persistence we need to make it stick this time!

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At first you started with a question that could lead to anywhere and the answer was quite concrete at first, but the client started to wonder off in all directions, getting emotional over failed attempts, but clearly stated that something did work. You may find it very impolite to cut someone off, because they are venting. Now you are being soft instead of being safe. You need to cut off a person, that talks easily and runs off in all directions. You do it however by empathizing and complimenting before you change direction. Now you kept it safe and you regained control.

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By asking to elaborate on a previous successes you are actually inviting to self-complimenting (line 3), while learning what works for the client. The self-compliment invite did not pay off and the client wonders off again so you need to canalize the emotional tsunami by zooming into a detail (line 5). I also get the information I want. You may want to funnel it a bit more, but then you need to close the subject. You do it by summarizing, paraphrasing it with an emphasis on the positive achievements (line 7). How positive you are depends on the self-complimenting response of the client.  You close with a level 3 compliment, when credibility allows it.

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At the end of the session, you need to summarize again and when a goal change was negotiated, it must be a part of the summary with the reason for change and what the new goal is. The client needs to agree with the summary and you compliment again.

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The Window Shopper

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We have discussed several techniques, that you may find too cautious. That’s because they are geared towards the worst case scenario and that represents someone in window shopper stage. You learned from the previous post that Windows shoppers believe they have no problem and are usually pressured into visiting you. They expect to be judged, liked they have been by the person that pressured them in the first place.

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Instead they are being taken seriously and even received some compliments that they felt were genuine. Most clients will start to open up and may move up to the searcher stage. Their denial of the problem, may well in fact be a response to being pressured or be related to the insecurity of their own control over the problem. To admit that, they need to be in a safe environment and you can create that with the tools provided.

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It’s not always as smooth as I’ve shown above and  I’ll give you an example in my early years as a coach when I helped kids in weight loss programs. The parents from one 13 year old girl asked me to talk to her in the hopes of convincing her to stop smoking. Mind you, I really was not up for the task.

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Me: You know smoking is not healthy.

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Girl: Whatever, I smoke and I’m healthy.

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Me: You may be healthy, but others get sick from smoking.

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Girl: No way, all my friends smoke and they are all healthy.

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Me: You see that guy across the street, he smokes and he got sick.

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Girl: Yeah, but he is old!

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So much for education!

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This girl definitely did not believe she had a problem with smoking. I, on the other hand, had some serious problems. Although I was not experienced, I did figure out (after banging my head a couple times) that this was going nowhere. So I stopped with trying to ‘educate’ her.

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Instead I asked her a bunch of questions of how she ended up seeing me. And, of course, her parents had sent her.  I asked what her parents thought that she would get out of this arrangement. Her answer was typical and eloquent “don’t know”.  At the time, I did not know what to do with such an answer, but we will cover it on the next post. Then I asked her,  what her ideal world would look.  Because did not believe she had a problem, I wanted to know what an ideal world would like through her eyes. I was grasping at that moment.

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Her answer stomped me because her perfect world would be a world without her parents!!!  Of course, this is not that strange in puberty. But what I did not realize at the time was that just because she did not believe she had a problem with smoking, did not mean that she did not have a problem. She was a window shopper on the smoking issue and a searcher on the problem with her parents. One girl, multiple stages, which makes perfect sense (unless you confuse stages with types of people). Her problem with her parents was nothing serious, but a problem nonetheless. I started focusing on that part and I will elaborate on it in the next post, that revolves around the searcher.

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Winding Down

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We have covered a lot more than I anticipated in this post, but I hope you can understand why I needed this many words, to get a couple of concepts across. These are the foundation of good coaching. Even when you do most of it intuitively, those who have a better understanding of why they do what they will definitely be more successful. Even with all your talent, which I applaud you for, you can tweak your skills, to get even better.

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Safety first, gets a whole new meaning here and it starts with empathizing. You need to hold back on the education, because it may imply judgment of bad previous lifestyle choices, which may lead to a complete lockdown. If we want a chance to get something through their skull, we need to find the entrance and it lies in their hearts. Creating a safe environment will create the conditions necessary to relax more, while motivating by complimenting, will open up their heart.

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All this can be refined by using funneling techniques in our conversations. It’s both efficient to clients to talk sparingly and the ones you cannot seem to shut up. These are again skills that grow with practice and I want to leave you with an assignment that you can apply in every session, but also in every conversation you strike.

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1. Try to analyze when you needed to empathize instead of being positive.
2. Hold of the direct compliments, but focus more on indirect compliments.
3. Try to get from an indirect compliment to a level 3 compliment.
4. Try to detect any signs of change willingness and how you got there.
5. Evaluate any session / conversation and think of stuff to improve upon the next time.

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Every session while training or talking, I have had the last few years, has been recorded and as I experimented with concepts and techniques from MI, SFBT and positive psychology, I got to see the results. Because I also teach this stuff, my students get to see my video’s and literally learn from my mistakes. That’s why I spent so much time analyzing this stuff and it has resulted in great gains in rehab, prehab, and performance cases. I wish nothing less for you and your clients and hope to see you again with the next post where we will discuss techniques to deal with the searcher stage.

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References

• Lester PB (2011), McBride S, Bliese PD, Adler AB.  Bringing science to bear: An empirical assessment of the Comprehensive Soldier Fitness program. American Psychologist, Vol 66(1), Jan 2011, 77-81.
• Gaume J (2009), Gmel G, Faouzi M, Daeppen JB. Counselor skill influences outcomes of brief motivational interventions. J Subst Abuse Treat. 2009 Sep;37(2):151-9. Epub 2009 Mar 31.
• Pollak KI (2010). Physician communication techniques and weight loss in adults. American Journal of Preventive Medicine, 39(4), 321-328.
• Stams GJ (2006), Dekovic M, Buist K, e.a. Effectiviteit van oplossingsgerichte korte therapie: een meta-analyse. Gedragstherapie. 39, 2, 81-94

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